Us, unleashed.

So, I believe I mentioned a while back that Ms. P quit her job. She's been looking for another one, but nothing is manifesting yet, and the difference between how she was with that job and how she is without that job are so profound that, unless we absolutely can't pull it off, neither of us think she should take a job "just because."

I mean, she's in school now, and she'll be full-time starting this summer, and the long-term plan is for her to go to seminary. Anything other than a job that is totally aligned with this plan is going to slow her down.

A moment from When Harry Met Sally. Harry and Sally have had a falling out, and he's been trying to apologize and repair things, but she's just too angry. So he corners her at a New Year's Eve party and tells her he loves her. And when she tells him that he can't just tell her that to make himself feel better, he says, "And it's not because I'm lonely. And it's not because it's New Year's Eve. But when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."

She's figured out the vocation she wants to spend the rest of her life with. And she wants the rest of her life to start as soon as possible.

My fears about this have been twofold. First, money. Duh. We like it. Our bank likes it. Our landlords like it. But second, I have worried that her being home would turn into the Depression Chronicles: all sleeping the day away on the couch.

But it hasn't been like that at all. Oh sure, there's been the odd nap on the couch, but the odd nap on the couch doesn't worry me. She's done homework and housework and research and crafted a really great morning routine for herself, one that prioritizes spirituality and attention to her self.

In the month since she's been out of the office, I've seen her blossom, and I want this for her.

And so we're looking at our finances again. My take-home salary has gone down a little bit because I put her on my insurance -- and because, being queer, we're taxed on what the company pays for her insurance (don't even get me started!). I'm less and less interested in doing financial writing, mostly because I'm being utterly entranced with the life coaching business that is rapidly happening -- much more rapidly than I was anticipating, actually!

It's not a given that she won't have to take make-work for us to make it all work, but we spent some time today talking about what we could get rid of / cut back to help. And it occured to me that we could get rid of our cell phones. We're 1.5 years into a 2 year contract, and I seem to remember there being something about being able to cut out of the contract early without penalty assuming we made it past six months or something. So we're going to look into that.

And I have to say: the very IDEA of getting rid of the cell phone is filling me with joy. Visceral, embodied joy. No more being leashed to the temporal demands of others! No more having multiple people on the phone at once! Once upon a time, the cell phone enhanced my life -- and now it's just another leash to a world I don't want to be part of.

When, only two months ago now, we said we'd try paring back our expenses for a month and see how we did, we had no idea that it would catapult us into being this much closer to the lives we want to live this fast. It's mind-boggling. It's beautiful, and mind-boggling, and utterly expansive.

Comments

[dale]

Oh, I'm so glad! That all sounds absolutely terrific.