Somewhere in the middle of last week, as we negotiated babies and job searching and discernment tools, I sat down to try to think about what clues I've had about where my right life might lie.
The obvious clues are all about kids. If you ask me what I've done, happily, despite no one paying me to do it, it's think about and hang out with little kids.
But they weren't the only ones. I tried to think about times when I've become invisible to myself, times when time has disappeared and I've been in something like a trance, literally entranced by what I was doing. And I realized that I've had those experiences when I've had one-on-one conversations with people about the important stuff in their lives, particularly when they're trying to figure out what they should be done -- whether it's with a partner, a job, whatever.
Frankly, I'm one of those people who abhors small talk. If it's the thing that gets me to the good conversation, I can handle it, but if it's not getting me to the good conversation, forget it. And the good conversation? Spirituality, life's purpose, deep personality -- they leave me energized and kind of buzzing with satisfaction.
Once, a long time ago, I looked into life coach training with Martha Beck, whose books on life design I've long loved. But it's expensive, and we didn't have it to spare. But now, while we're far from financially secure, we do have it. It's one of the unlooked-for blessings of the adoption plan no longer being front and center. And so, after running the idea by Ms. P and by my spiritual director, I signed up.
As luck would have it, a session is starting on March 10. My pre-work, a long-ish paper interview, is due today. And contemplating turning my notes into the finished pre-work document is giving me serious butterflies. I feel like I'm staring at the phone, trying to get up the nerve to call the cute girl I want to ask out.
It's not a big sign, but it's another tiny piece to add to the puzzle I'm painstakingly putting together. I have no idea where this will lead as far as my career, as far as how my life will unfold. But it seems like the next right thing, and so here I go, into the great unknown.
Again.
:-) It sounds wonderful, like a wonderful idea.
Posted by: dale | February 23, 2009 at 10:44 PM