Right here. Right now.

I'm all in a jumble right now, mostly because last week ended up constituting a series of kicks to the gut. First was the email back from my sister (lunch is tomorrow); then was finding out that my mother hadn't told her sisters about our adoption plans; then was spending the whole day with my MIL, who was all about the smalltalk and who, whenever adoption came up, talked about her nephew, who was adopted out of foster care and who has ADHD and who was a challenge to her sister; then was hosting The Divine Ms. M, who is, as her name indicates, divine, but she was also another guest whose presence was interfering in my ability to pull the covers over my head.

Ms. P and I, we have a tendency to get too busy, too scheduled, and then everything else falls apart: journaling, meditation, eating well. And when that happens, we end up unbalanced, literally and figuratively, less able to manage all of the things that are ours to manage.

And so we get up, dust ourselves off, and begin again. Right here. Right now.

We both did morning pages this morning, Ms. P made us all a lovely dairy-free egg scramble, I'm drinking tea (not coke!), and we're going to have family meeting tonight. I'm going to walk to Whole Foods for lunch, and I'm going to try to retain enough energy to take the dogs for a short walk when we get home, just to have some physicality in my day. I also need to squeeze in a little candle-gazing, as per my spiritual director's instructions. It's not the routine we want, yet, but it's a start.

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