If Only There Were A Good Reason

If only there were a good reason for my achy head. We went to Ms. P's office holiday party yesterday, and now that I think about it, there might be a good reason for my achy head: the two brattiest children I've encountered recently.

Now, let's be clear. I adore children. I've spent most of my life making money by taking care of other people's children, and I'm pretty good at it. I know just how hard it is to have small fry attached to you for endless hours every day, and I know that you can't ever predict or control how kids are. I'm not so into judging people's parenting.

However. Both girls--7 and 4--were nightmares. They rearranged furniture. They hit people, over and over and over. They screamed a lot. They put food in inappropriate places, like decorative baskets. They were rude and demanding and insistent. They came very close to deliberately smearing melted chocolate on the carpet. Their mothers just sat where they were and said, over and over, "oh, [name], stop that." "If you don't stop doing that, we'll go home." And then not going home, not enforcing anything they said, not always noticing bad behavior.

I know they're both single moms and I'm sure they were both so happy to get out with adults that they weren't as concerned. But they were so bad that A, who hosted the party, joked that she didn't know when she'd next get to have sex because they were freaking her husband out so much. I'm not sure she was kidding. I know they were so bad we left early.

We sat in the car, waiting for people to unblock our parking space, and just kept saying, "Oh my." At least we found out that we have about the same tolerance for bad behavior, and about the same standards for what counts as bad behavior. (Things like knocking stuff over or spilling things or being excitable do not count--that's just kids, although you try to help them learn to limit it.)

Today's headache is probably from some dairy and wheat consumption yesterday, and I'm sure some water and tea and good food will help clear it up. That is, unless the animals drive me to self-inflicted torture, which they're looking to do today.